Usually, I try to hide my strangest thoughts as I worry what people will think. I like making friends, I like connecting with vibes, but am I too much?
I'm about to test myself, and you...
Because I am about to reveal something that you may not be able to comprehend and may make you do a slow backtrack straight out of my life. Or not. Who knows.
You know those Florida Man headlines? Usually, it's something wild and outrageous that captures readers' attention and leaves them shaking their heads in disbelief. These headlines are often feature bizarre incidents involving an individual from Florida.
This is where I mention that I was born, raised, and have lived in Florida. These headlines astonish me, and I sometimes wonder where the hell these people come from. LOL.
But I don't just read the headlines and move on. My brain isn't wired to be that simple. No, no. I usually assign book tropes to these headlines, and although I never mention these to anyone else or even write them down, they exist--to me. Which ironically enough, may be strange enough to be its own headline. Maybe I am this way because I'm a "Florida Man."
Whatever....
For the hell of it, I decided to give a few examples of this crazy ride my brain is on in hopes it makes you smile, laugh, or feel better about yourself. haha.
Florida Man Trapped in Unlocked Closet for Two Days
Trope: Forced Proximity
He technically wasn't alone. The woman he was with (in my head) is his soulmate. They'd be made for each other.
Florida Man Bites Off Friend’s Ear Over Argument About Who Was ‘More Alpha’
Trope: Enemies to Lovers
Their story didn't end here. This is a spicy MM waiting to happen and I'm here for it. I'm still convinced Mike Tyson is in love with Evander Holyfield.
Florida Man Steals Date’s Car, Then Uses It for Another Date
Trope: Love Triangle
This man made wild decisions, and although I'd rather it just be a WHY CHOOSE, he didn't take that route. Full disclosure: I saw this on a Florida news source, but I don't think it was an actual Florida Man.
Florida Man Calls 911 to Complain About His Subway Sandwich
Trope: Grumpy/Sunshine
It takes a real grump to complain about his sandwich to the police (although I feel this is incredibly relatable LOL), but I'd like to think the person who made it was a ray of sunshine, and their destiny is to fall in love.
Florida Man Arrested After Allegedly Performing ‘Karate Moves’ on Swans
Trope: Meet-cute
Imagine meeting your soulmate after he kicks this guy's ass for kicking swans! He approaches your picnic and says, "Can I borrow your knife?" and you're like, "Um ok." and he says 'Thanks," then runs toward the guy who is kicking swans and stabs him.
That is all for now. I hope I didn't scare you away. haha. In order to sell books, I shouldn't be so honest, but it's fair to know that in my books, you may come across a random "Katie-ism," and you should be prepared. NOW GO READ ONE!!! hehe.
All my love and crazy,
Katie
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